How many nights a week you wake up with sticky boxers cause you were dreaming of Clay Aiken? Your wife mad?
take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
So it turns out high me is very efficient. I set 5 alarms to remind me to do things, i made mac and cheese, and i wrote a poem. I'm going places.
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