grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
He's finally divorcing her, so naturally he tells me that we're not exclusive anymore. His penis 'wants what it wants' apparently.
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
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