When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
I'm chasing my vodka with snickers.
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
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