if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
Randomize