This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
It's noon and i am somehow drinking by myself in a jazz tent in broad daylight.
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
woke up to an unread text message i sent to myself: "brreakfdast..pork and ice cream."
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
His hands were made for my vagina.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
Go to the bar. Find a girl. Ask if she can cook. Tell her you have a guitar at home. Ask her if she wants to see it. Bring her home. Sleep with her. Tell her it's your birthday in the morning. Enjoy your made with lust breakfast.
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
Randomize
