Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
wat bout pragnant strippers??
Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
My boss' voice literally gives me gas
i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
Doing 9 month old dishes in my bath tub. These dishes literally had enough time to gestate a human child
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
Randomize