I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
Do you know what the cost code is for strip clubs? I'm filling out my company expense report right now
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
Randomize
