Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
Noooo. I told you she WAS a cancer. Not that she HAS cancer. This was the one time being a doctor didnt get you laid you alcoholic bastard
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
Randomize
