I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
Whenever I don't wipe thoroughly after shitting, I just think that anyone if anyone sticks their finger up my ass, they had it coming.
Just got a call at work, I have to consent to a random drug and alcohol test by end of business day, if you arranged this it's the best/worst April fools prank ever.
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
Mitt romney looks like a fantastic lover (full disclorsure: im 76% vodka right now)
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
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