if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
I often worry that if I get famous, people from my past will recognize me and start talking to the media
Randomize
