I think we should go ahead and pin a note to my shirt when we go out that says"do NOT buy me shots"
On the back we can put possible side effects may include: indiscriminate making out, brief crying spells, yelling in jibberish, and sudden sleep.
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
false alarm, still single
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