I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
We were destined to go to rehab together
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
I just want to make out with him forever
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
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