I just had to pull over at a starbucks to throw up in the bathroom. They really should not have let me be a lawyer.
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
So i banged this chick from Peru last night. Needless to say, I'm having chipotle for lunch todayas a south American reward to honor her.
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
PS: I just woke up from my shower
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
Randomize
