How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
I totally just friend requested the girl I met in jail last night so that I could give her back the sunglasses she lent me upon our release. See, I'm not a total delinquent.
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
I took 20 bucks from you because when I woke up I saw more of you than I ever wanted to see bro.
Totally acceptable.
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
Where was Alyssa when you were sniffing the bouncer?
Passed out on some guy who looked like someone from Duck Dynasty.
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
I feel like emojis are just meant for explaining sex without using words to make anyone uncomfortable. It's a true gift
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
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