I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
Just saw some airport workers running through the terminal with liquor bottles. That's my kind of emergency.
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
Randomize
