Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
Why is there a condom in my ukulele?
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
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