Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
you were so drunk that when the mouse on your laptop didnt work anymore you decided to just take it into the bathroom and pee on it while laughing like a mad scientist.
Just in case you forgot, you puked all over your boss house, pissed on his coffee table, and were then thrown out by his wife
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
Randomize
