ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
Having a midget officiate your wedding because you think it'd be hilarious: good idea or potential lawsuit?
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize
