Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
I booty called her while she was in labor.
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
I must have drunkenly masturbated really loud last night, cause my roommate and his wife wont look at me
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
Hold on...did you Instagram a picture of you and your boyfriend while you were sending me dirty snapchats?
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
Randomize