Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
You need Jesus. Or a midol and a snickers. Whichever.
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
N I'm drinking this invention I call "do-it-fluid" I had a bottle of vodka that was 3/4th empty, so I put in 1/4th rum, 1/4th tequila, 1/4th whisky... it's definitely the worst idea ever..
I slipped on a piece of pizza last night and when the bouncer helped me up I told him the garbage can pushed me.
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
Is it a coincidence that the reminder on my phone to take my birth control is "I'm ready to party" from Bridesmaids?
This strange Italian man told me he wants to take me for ice cream and kept calling me "tomato" from tinder
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
After returning from the hospital with lock-jaw from getting tackle at the game. Some naked chick busted out of his room and hit him with a devastating haymaker to the jaw because he wouldn't have sex
Randomize
