Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
What I thought it would be sexy pouring melted chocolate down here chest, ended up in second degree burns. Hot food and sex do not mix.
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
He will. He has no choice. What's he gonna do? Find a better fuck buddy? We both know that's not possible. I'm the ideal friend with benefit. Minus snoring and uneven tits.
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
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