i just realized i've been trying to levitate the potatoe chip out of her hand for the past ten minutes. i think i smoked to much.
Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
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