I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
dude, i warned you that using a card to pay for my hotel room was a bad idea. You deserve the extra $600 in cleaning fees
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
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