When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
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