I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
you were so drunk you tried to use the microwave as a calculator for your BAC
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
I am the master of subtle flirting. I seduced him by simulating a hand job with an epi-pen during training.
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
My legs feel like baby dolphins
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
Did we kick in my basement door last night?
Yes. I think you actually bought tennis shoes specifically for that application.
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