No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
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