Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
I feel like a combination of david goes to the dentist and drunkest guy ever goes for more beer
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
Im the macgyver of cooling down beers. The toilet tank was blocked so I couldn't use it.....
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
You got me 4 pizzas and i just saw this. I'm too drunk for this shit. I just yelled "4 pizzas holy shit!" At the pizza dude
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
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