Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
My stalker sent me an erotic poem. Who knew anyone could find a way to rhyme birth and girth so eloquently?
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
I’m going to lick a fucking door knob when this shit is all over
Probably Waffle House
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