i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
I don't think brook has ever known best
i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
She's walking around topless with a bottle of red wine, crying and singing showtune ballads. This is actually an improvement.
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
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