Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
wow bdsm is so cute
Drunk text the hot guy two doors down confessing my love for him.... He gave me a thank you card today.
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
Randomize
