this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
All signs point to mom being high. 1) making chicken at 2 am. 2) dancing to smooth jazz. 3) she asked where the peanut butter was
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
Green mimosas i think yes
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
Randomize