Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
the condom got lost in my hair
It's a pity Stephen Hawking can't do sarcasm.
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
Randomize
