That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
I just tried to pick my 105-lb puppy up and accidentally fingered its asshole
There are some things we keep to ourselves Brian
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
Randomize
