i think my tv is drunk
i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
Randomize