I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
I think I have vodka in my lungs
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
I'm wearing a fleece onesie eating pop tarts on the train to work. Killing it.
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
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