Dual....:-)
did i leave my keys in your car? BTW: sorry for throwing that drink on your date.
ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
Randomize
