dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
listening to happy ending by mika while imagining him to run after me at an aiport in slow motion... also, dipping oreos in baileys. not taking this breakup well. at. all.
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
Randomize
