yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
Don't ever give your dog some hamburger at midnight. Its impossible to enjoy a late night burger when your dog just threw it up all over your carpet. Gremlin rules work with dogs.
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
Randomize