Rocking a Headband at the strip club, because of Rock of Love this shit is like their kryptonite, I smell like stripper butter and back child support.
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
Welp, I've officially cried in every Chipotle bathroom in the city. Correlation or causation?
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
Randomize
