a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
Randomize
