Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
This spray tan I used isn't working out. I spent an hour exfoliating and rubbing the damn stuff in with rubber gloves. I wanted the alluring, sun-kissed, sexy look. I've achieved smelling like burnt popcorn and the cats won't stop licking me. I'm a salt lick for cats.
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
Randomize
