I know i'm drunk when the "men" sign on the bathroom sounds chinese
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
Randomize