i just bought a vibrator and the cashier says "have fun with that." i didnt realise what he said so i responded "you too." and then he gave me his number...
ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
I just figured out that you can toast a marshmallow with a butter knife and a cigarette lighter. I'm like a retarded Mister Wizard
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
Randomize
