Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
Woke up with a treasure map of my room stuck with sticky tape to my ceiling. followed it and found $75 with a note saying; "eat this if we're invaded"... I'm never getting stoned again
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
Note to self: the judgement that occurs when unrolling your last 5 which was used to snort drugs the night before, to pay for alcohol before noon on a Monday is worth just sucking it up and taking an overdraft fee.
Wait a min, you had drugs last night?!
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
Randomize
