matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
Sorry for talking about super scientific shit so much last night, I know it bugs you sometimes when I don't shut up.
What? You sat on the couch for a solid 2 hours staring at your fingerprints and the only word that came out of your mouth was "how"
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
If I didn't have booty calls, my apartment would never get clean
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