FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
Let's go get our ovaries removed together. It'll be like bonding by getting mani/pedis, but with more vicodin and less unwanted pregnancies.
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
Do you remember some guy walking around the club saying "boner patrol" and smacking people in the dick?
Yeah, that was you
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
THIS IS THE 11TH FUCKING COFFEE TABLE THAT YOU AND RICHARD CRASHED THROUGH.
I'm surprised me and Richard survived 11 of your coffee tables.
YOU TWO ARE BUYING ME A NEW ONE I AM PISSED.
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
Randomize
