Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
My roommate is on the phone with one of her friends trying to figure out how she threw up IN her pants. I'm not sure whether to burst out laughing or direct her towards Plan B.
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
Randomize