well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
Randomize