everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move."
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
yeah i wanted to show him what i was missing, so i decided to send him a seductive picture, like the ones where the girls are eating strawberries and whipped cream. well i didn't have those, so i sent him a picture of myself naked eating a bagel
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