i just shit 3 out of the 4 types of matter
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
Randomize
