If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
Whenever you feel bad about your life, just remember the time I tried to swim while high and thought for a minute I was genuinely drowning
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
This morning was so rough I can't even. I was cutting up vegetables for my omelet on the floor. THE FLOOR. I sat on the floor because I felt like I was gonna vom.
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
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